The most incredible achievements of my life and the most pleasurable experiences did not even begin to materialize for me until well into my thirties. When I was 33 I wrote down everything I wanted to do in this lifetime- all the far off goals that seemed so unattainable- and I had done everything on that list and more by the time I was 40. I never would have guessed the incredible adventures and joys and achievements that awaited me. I’m amazed, too looking back on that list that must have seemed like a complete fantasy at the time. It included:

  • Developing a critically acclaimed video game
  • getting over 100k subscribers on youtube
  • learning to surf
  • visiting every continent
  • lecturing and touring around the world with a successful course
  • Finding the love of my life and entering into loving partnership
  • Having more mind blowing incredible sex than I could imagine
  • Living in Japan
  • dating an ero cosplay model
  • Making a meaningful contribution to the world of Magic and self development
  • making enough from self employment to have financial freedom

Every one of these desires I had attained within a handful of years- by the time I was completing my curriculum in the outer order in fact . And more than that too- I was not only becoming the person I had dreamed of being, a person I loved – I was also seeing positive change in the world around me. People were doing what I was doing and also seeing these incredible changes in themselves as well. I was carrying a powerful message that was helping many others who felt crushed by society to reclaim their own identity. While the harems and orgies and kinky dominations I’ve been a part of were indeed mind blowing and my sex life continues to unfold in exciting and enticing ways- they were also helping to shift the way we think about sex and relationships as a culture. I’m so humbled that in these pleasurable pursuits my partners and I have been a part of this great shifting in the collective consciousness around how we engage with sensuality, love and intimacy.

Focus on what you want to DO

The most important change that began to happen for me when I wrote that first list- I stopped focusing on what I wanted to BE and started focusing on what I wanted to DO. Rather than thinking “I want to BE a game developer” I started thinking “I want to develop a game”. It’s two entirely different paths actually. While I was stuck for so long on being a game dev - I was working on a portfolio and applying to jobs and trying to be noticed online. None of that was actually moving me closer to developing a game. When I shifted my attention to the things I wanted to do- it became really clear that I was wasting a lot of time trying to follow the normal paths. I was blessed with a flexible and well paying job that allowed me to pursue whatever I wanted. Rather than worrying about how “break in” to the games industry I just set myself to make a game . I didn’t worry about how it looked or sounded or anything I just started doing it the best I could with what I had. And by magic the right artists and musicians began to appear as I moved forward.

I wanted to travel- so instead of waiting to be someone who traveled I just started buying tickets and worrying about what to do about my cat and money and work later. And again as if by magic- the opportunities unfolded when I took those actions.

I was doing all this while following the curriculum of the A.’.A.’. - ostensibly to figure out my true will. Ironically the whole time I had been doing that will. It was like by focusing on the work of spiritual development- the goal had arrived long before I realized I even began.